


Words

by orphan_account



Category: Big Bang (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Ficlet, M/M, Wordcount : under 200, collection of drabbles, theme : death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-08
Updated: 2018-04-08
Packaged: 2019-04-20 01:48:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,157
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14250465
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: For everything there's always an ending.





	Words

**Biblichor**

Daesung watches him swaying between pages, eyes scanning words, voice dies in his head. He watches him dancing by shelves, the tone of his feet tapping the tiles is comforting. He watches him thinking, frowning, absorbing new knowledge and rejecting some that’s the opposite of his beliefs. He feels him sinking, drowning in the stories, slowly but surely becoming one of the character, typical runaway of desperation. He knows him, heart and soul, laughter and fool. He loves him, rain and nights, peace and fights. He adores him, joys and sorrow, heart and hollow.

“An angel is watching over you.”

The silence breaks and their eyes meet. For once, a sentence sounds like a wish that came true. Perhaps a summary of feeling.

Of falling.

“Always, hyung,” Daesung says and another feather is gone.

 

**Hydrangea**

Love doesn’t come free. There are so many things to trade, to give away. Love is not a symbol of freedom, rather a flag for sacrifice, an open waterfall without really any place to end.

Love is a failure, the biggest one.

And Daesung knows that, all the doom he will get as consequences. It’s far from hell, it’s a _fucking_ apocalypse. He knows what love will take, bits and pieces it will gnaw the moment he sees his face. He knows what it will be selfish about, the moment their gaze collide. He knows, he feels it upon his throat, what love will attempt to have by the first time he says hello.

Still, he takes a step.

“Hi,” Seunghyun smiles, oblivious to their fate. Of course, he doesn’t know what love could bring.

Daesung knows better, he always does, about the beginning of failing.

 

**Sirius**

Their glasses clink a deafening sound against the silence, a last defense to the world’s end. It’s their last day, maybe not even going to make it to another night. Stars are hanging above them in the bright open sky, greeting a goodbye until their chance to be reborn again.

They are standing on ruins, surrounded by the debris of war, happiness is long forgotten. Peace is just a myth, time is constant, travelling is just another word for running. There is nothing left but themselves, but each other. The sun doesn’t count because it’s always around, the wind can’t make it to the list as it’s just a result of the aftermath.

There is no magic, no hope, no wonder or question. Answers aren’t possible. So is life.

“Happy birthday,” Seunghyun says even though dates are no longer intact, today is no longer valid.

Daesung smiles because maybe it’s true, maybe Seunghyun is a prophet, maybe he doesn’t think of suicide by every death they encountered. Maybe there is a dream, somewhere far away, that the Earth will tumble to its right spin once again.

For now, the comet still comes.

 

**Moiety**

Not the same but part of one another. The fit together like puzzle pieces, making a big picture for a future. One without sorrow, one with a hope. Wishes don’t always come into reality but heaven isn’t much far, at least not now.

“I’m scared.”

It’s statement that pulls Daesung to Seunghyun’s embrace, to his hold like when they’re younger. Stronger, without being pushed by hate.

“To die?” Seunghyun asks but it’s just a breath, a shaky one that comes out like a recited dialogue. The word that tumbled down fluently after years and years waiting beyond patience.

“To let you to see me die,” Daesung answers. His skin is pale, still glows under the dim light, bleed into the surrounding of white walls and the beeping sound.

“You know I would –”

“Come right away,” Daesung smiles. And it’s a genuine smile, something that Seunghyun thought he had forgotten. “I know, hyung.”

“I promise.”

So there they are, two monsters for the community, threats to the holy faith. There they are, souls that love each other. There they are, people with hearts, just like the others.

There they are, crossing the gates to eternity, together.

 

**Elision**

Four letter word. Two vowels in equal to two consonants. The remnant of what once were, of what they were. The very last something that Seunghyun can use as an achor, the very last something that Daesung chants like his prayer. It’s a relief if not a curse. It’s something valuable, even beyond everyone’s expectation.

It’s something that cannot be simply thrown away for it was a piece of now no longer visible emotion. It’s how they cope, why they are moving on. It’s a reminder that once upon a time, happiness was not lost in the vague translation. There are other things that less matter, there are others that less valuable. There are so much more of what could be but never come close to this one thing.

Dangling like a punctuation mark, a pause, a separation of decisions. Stuck in the same verse, carrying on with an old song, over and over again. Clawing on the edge of his gut, a palpable sense of loss, horrifying in its glory, certainly tangible.

Pain.

 

**Panacea**

Forgiving is a sin as much as it’s a salvation. An act out of disgust or love, all the same. Some souls aren’t meant to be saved, some people are made to be doomed. Some certain emotions are supposed to be banned, to be banished for its ability to corrupt one’s mind.

“I can’t,” Seunghyun’s tears stream. Reflection of regrets, of too many _too late_ -s. Alive is an important word but never was it as important as now. Even as nothing seems to be believable as purpose anymore. “Not without you.”

Snow is falling, uncomprehend to one’s adventure. Then again, when was anything?

“You can’t leave me,” anger rises like steam, filling the empty heart of the man once a soldier, of a broken being who carries his heart to its forever Eden. Grieve is born within curses, a deal is set for it cannot be reserved as a goal. Revenge is a promising future, after all.

 

**Pompeii**

The screaming is loud but the storm doesn’t shake. They don’t either. Hands are tied with reminiscences, recollection of past events that won’t be repeated. Clock is spinning, no longer could be deciphered. The herald angel sings, a melody of doomsday. But they’re not lost, not forgetting. They are pretty much living, under the roof, in the calm of the bed where catastrophe can easily sneak between the cracks. They are not running from, not turning their backs.

Because the beginning started with a vow of them collapsing into the end, drowning in the mud of fallen sun and moon and stars as an entity, even without a name but them one.

Because before, without a fear, they had chosen to live a life that led them to now, welcoming death with open arms as if it’s a part of their love.

Because unlike the others, they don’t have to cheat.

 


End file.
